Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
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