just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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