i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
Randomize
