If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Randomize
