its not stalking. its research.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Randomize
