I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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