That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
The beer is more important than you right now.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
It's blow job season.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize