Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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