Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
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