hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize
