It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
sarcasm needs its own font
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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