I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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