Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Randomize
