I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
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