Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
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