I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
