So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Randomize
