Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
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