dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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