drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
Randomize
