Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
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