butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
