Capitaan dildo arrescate!
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Randomize
