My hair reeks of homosexuality.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
Randomize
