SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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