ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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