I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
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