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I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
He felt like a one man threesome
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
I need a burrito and a hug.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
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