Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
