The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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