Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
My vagina is officially offended.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Randomize