Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Randomize
