used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
