you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
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