I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
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