Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
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