Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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