You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
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