I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
