i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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