What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Randomize
