Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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