he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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