Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
