two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize