How'd it feel making her break her religion?
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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