Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Randomize
