Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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