he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize
