He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
