'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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