I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
