I want to stick my p in your. b.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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